Bottom Quotes
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#4332 + ()/39 - [ Report ]
// Dr. Jones explaining a chem lab
Dr. Jones: Every year I have people who say 'The precipitate disappeared, but nothing happened!' Guys, if the precipitate disappeared, did something happen?
Everyone: Yes...
Dr. Jones: I'm like WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING? If the precipitate disappeared, that means something happened! -
#3816 + ()/53 - [ Report ]
// Substituting for Bello's HUM
Blackwell: I recommend you guys never to answer this question if anyone asks you this: What is your favorite fruit. Once you give the answer, the person will know everything about you: your hobbies, your favorite color, your sexual preferences...
Student: So what is your favorite fruit, Mr. Blackwell.
Blackwell: Oh, I rather not say.
Class: C'mon. Please?
Blackwell: Well, if you all insist. A pineapple.
Class: ??
Blackwell: Oh yes. You can do all sorts of things with a pineapple. You can eat it, you can throw it, you can rub it on your back, you can use it as a dangerous weapon... -
#1447 + ()/39 - [ Report ]
// In Mr. Williams' Algebra II class, a student calls Mr. Williams over to fix her calculator, which had been troublesome
Student: See? It says, "Bad Guess." What did I do?
*Mr. Williams tries a few things*
Mr. Williams (under breath): Uh, this thing is possessed. *steps away* -
#5834 + ()/44 - [ Report ]
// Acio chem, talking about the fail presentations he had to grade at VJAS
Acio: ...but the voltage is all about the electrodes, not the fruit! Then, she told me it had to do with the MASS of the fruit. I'm like OH. MY. GO-
Student: Well yeah Dr. Acio, that's why power plants are so big.
Acio: Yeah, you just go in there, open a door, and BAM, a big-ass WATERMELON sitting there!
