Bottom Quotes
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#3841 + ()/50 - [ Report ]
// During Junior ethics seminar
Stueben: So this one time my wife comes up to me and says "I have the greatest idea! Let's go on vacation to San Francisco this week! It will be so great, we can go sailing and touring and eat at all the fabulous restaurants!" And I said "Sure! Let's go!" Except it was a total lie. I really didn't want to go at all. All I wanted to do was sit in my basement and solve math problems. -
#3297 + ()/48 - [ Report ]
Mr. Majeske: They like to rotate around the chairs of the committees, so they can get pictures of all of them holding the victorious gavel. They send those pictures back to the voters in their districts and they say "Dang, look at him with his gavel! I don't have a gosh-darn clue what that guy does but he sure looks good with that gavel. I'm going to vote for him so he can stay with the gavel longer." Isn't that sad?
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#3184 + ()/64 - [ Report ]
// While having a discussion on the importance of French history...
// (Everything is said in French.)
Mme. Lasalle: What did this mean for the people, the citizens and their livelihoods?
*silence*
Mme. Lasalle: Come on, I need some more participation in this class! ...Yes, Nicole?
Nicole: How do you say 'velociraptor' in French?
Mme. Lasalle: Pardon? ...Uhm, well, most scientific terms stay the same across the languages--
Nicole: I AM A VELOCIRAPTOR!!!
Mme. Lasalle: *facepalm* -
#2040 + ()/48 - [ Report ]
Mr. Zack: If you're gonna try to kill someone, just shoot them. It's really hard to stab someone to death. You have to keep stabbing them a lot of times.
Ayman: What if you stab someone in the forehead?
Mr. Zack: You try stabbing yourself with a knife in the forehead! I mean...wait...not you...well, just trust me. It's hard to stab someone to death. -
#1111 + ()/46 - [ Report ]
// Talk is flying around the school about whether there will be an early closing
Cliff: Guys, FCPS is always subject to peer pressure. Everyone else is letting school out early, so they're gonna too. It's like they're in a big group of people smoking pot and finally, FCPS is like "give me a hit!" -
#395 + ()/50 - [ Report ]
// Talking about hiccups in biology, Mr. McFaden turns to a personal anecdotes after a few minutes of contemplation
Mr. McFaden: So a long time ago I went to a parochial Catholic school. Mind you this was back in the fifties. The pope at the time had the hiccups so the nun had us praying that they would stop. By the way, a short prayer is sometimes called an ejaculation from the latin root which means throw out. So the nuns had us ejaculating so the pope would stop hiccuping. -
#5154 + ()/53 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Potoker is talking about the different fouls in basketball, such as biting a player. Class asks why you would bite someone in the game anyways.
Mr. Potoker: Main rule is guys... you shouldn't be putting other people's body parts in your mouth and biting them!
*class snaps to attention and giggles*
Mr. Potoker: I was talking about BASKETBALL. Why do all smart kids have dirty minds? -
#4577 + ()/55 - [ Report ]
// Going off-track in discussion of Huckleberry Finn
O'Brien: Have you heard of spoonerisms? They're basically the switching the first letters of two different words. They're actually quite fun, but not in all cases; I've heard someone use a spoonerism of Huck Finn...
O'Brien: Unfortunately, that someone was me... -
#4397 + ()/63 - [ Report ]
// Parallel Computing
Steven: PEOPLE WHO INDENT THEIR CODE WITH SPACES AND NOT TABS SHOULD BE ARRESTED OR SHOT!
Mr. Torbert: See everyone, this is why you should all be glad we don't live in a Godofsky dictatorship.
Steven: Well, all of you who indent your code with spaces, at least. -
#4327 + ()/47 - [ Report ]
// English, Dr. Castaldo is lecturing about morals. A student happens to be using his cellphone under the desk at the time.
Dr. Castaldo: So it's important you always make the right decision- including not playing with your stuff under the table!
Class: ...
Dr. Castaldo: *realizes what she said* Oh dear...
