Bottom Quotes
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#1690 + ()/69 - [ Report ]
// Japanese class is being conducted outside today
Bird: *twitters loudly*
Rochkind sensei (in Japanese): Isn't that bird loud...
Bird: *continues to twitter*
Rochkind sensei (still in Japanese): If you don't shut up I'll... BANG.*acts like she shot it*
Bird: *stops twittering abruptly*
Student: I think you killed it. -
#1501 + ()/71 - [ Report ]
// Dr. Walker wishes he had more time to grade tests, work on the computer, etc.
Dr. Walker: Maybe if I had infinite time...
Jaskot: The limit as time approaches infinity!
Dr. Walker: Ha, yeah, the limit as time approaches infinity...
(class laughs a little)
Jaskot: Wow, I can't believe we just made that joke...
Dr. Walker: We didn't. You did. -
#5493 + ()/68 - [ Report ]
Mr. Zack: You know, there's a whole industry for graduation-related items, like announcements and prom and stuff. Guys, just pick flowers out of the yard or something. And for God's sake, don't rent a tux.
Marta: Who did you go with to prom, Mr. Zack?
Steven: He went with your mother.
Mr. Zack: Steven, I still hold your diploma in my hands.
*pause*
Mr. Zack: And she had a great time, by the way. -
#2775 + ()/68 - [ Report ]
// Doing the centripetal force demo (swinging a small platform by strings, an object is held on the platform)
Mr. Rose: Now I'm going to do this with a cup of water.
Class: Can you really do that?
Mr. Rose: *starts swinging* Sure, my hand-eye coordination is--
// Cup flies off the platform and at a student, spilling the water everywhere. -
#2234 + ()/80 - [ Report ]
// AP Biology
Dr. Uston: So, I heard of this story once, where a man and a woman were raising a chimp. After a number of years, the government forced them to put him in the zoo, because he wasn't allowed in their home. One day, when the chimp's birthday came around, the man brought the chimp a cake, and he was mauled by the other monkeys in the cage. Isn't that fascinating? -
#1669 + ()/66 - [ Report ]
// You learn many life lessons in history class...
Mr. Helm: No, Patrick, you never make your wife do ANYTHING, because at 2 a. m., she's the one lying next to you, her hands poised to smush a pillow over your face. And when that happens, you die. So no, you should never make your wife do anything. -
#929 + ()/76 - [ Report ]
WshngtonBsball: god dammit! My hallway reeks of pot
WshngtonBsball: my friend is crashing in my room tonight instead of down the hall because he lives right next to where they're smoking it
JasonGJi: wow
JasonGJi: well i can offer you some good news
WshngtonBsball: if you even breathe the word "geico"
JasonGJi: damn.
