Bottom Quotes
-
#5371 + ()/105 - [ Report ]
A: You know what would be cool? If Mr. Kummer narrated a documentary. There'd be some random thing happening, and halfway through he'd start talking about some girl he knew in college.
B: Oh, and Dr. Osborne could do the track for the hearing-impaired.
A: "I DON'T NEED SUBTITLES!!!" -
#2875 + ()/107 - [ Report ]
// During AP Physics
Dr. Dell: In most of the problems that we do, we're dealing with just one particle. Now this makes the math nice but it also leads to the seductive thought that the potential energy is OF the particle, which is NOT true! Don't give in to this seduction! ...because then you'll be pregnant with bad ideas. -
#2805 + ()/107 - [ Report ]
// In APUS, talking about voter turnout
Sleete: You know who I blame for bad turnout? MTV. Back in one election year, they had a campaign: Vote or die. Paris Hilton was one of the spokespeople. Oh, she wore the shirt, and she was in all the commercials... But she didn't vote. Why is she still alive? I'm waiting for MTV to fulfill its obligations. -
#1482 + ()/107 - [ Report ]
// Ms. Conklin is saying goodbye to a student, "Fabius" (his Latin name), before the weekend.
Ms. Conklin: Bye, Fob! That's my little Fob. I do love him. I just want to kiss him all the time.
Kids in class: Ummm, Ms. Conklin, do you know what you just called that guy?
Ms. Conklin: Fob? Yes, well, I shortened his name a bit... down to one syllable... Why, should I call him "Fobby" instead? -
#5557 + ()/106 - [ Report ]
// Bode's Rule Lab in Jarvis Geosystems
Question: Why is there no planet Minerva between Mars and Jupiter when Bode’s Rule seems to indicate there ought to be?
Two of the answers (and Mr. Jarvis's comments):
• Aliens have first attempted colonization on the planet Minerva, which did exist at one time. However, after finding the land unsuitable, they destroyed the planet into thousands of small rock fragments. – Very unlikely. We have yet to see aliens.
Jarvis' response: Well, there are some folks who claim to have seen them, but after talking to them, I have serious doubts about their grip on reality.
• The planet was eaten by a very hungry, very large cosmic troll. – Extremely unlikely. Although, unlike aliens, trolls do exist, we have yet to see one big enough to do such a thing.
Jarvis' response: I’ve had people in Iceland and Norway tell me about trolls. I think those perceptions are associated with very long winters.
Jarvis' comment: Nice job here. +1
Total grade: 13/12. -
#2403 + ()/114 - [ Report ]
// AP Physics
Dr. Dell: If the Hall Effect does not appear on the AP Exam, I will ... * pause *
Student: Use the noose?
Dr. Dell: No... *thinks for a minute* ...I will kiss the principal.
Dr. Dell: However, I won't French kiss him. I will probably sneak up on him and do it. I am very sneaky. -
#1694 + ()/114 - [ Report ]
// Alyson Yee tutors a little kid at a nearby elementary school and is explaining why next week is the last session
A: So next week is the last time I'll see you this year!
Kid: What are you going to do on Wednesdays if you don't come see me? *pout*
A: It's not like it'll be fun. I have to stay in school and take [AP and SOL] tests.
Kid: Hmph. I bet you're helping another student.
A: Wha?? It's not like I'm CHEATING on you!! -
#4737 + ()/108 - [ Report ]
Corinna: I KNOW that we have a quiz today, Mr. Richardson, I bet you five dollars.
Mr. Richardson: Okay, then give me the five dollars.
*Corinna hands over the five dollars*
Mr. Richardson: Well, you were right. We _were_ going to have a quiz today... but I would rather have the five dollars. -
#2143 + ()/112 - [ Report ]
// A writing exercise where the students write whatever comes to mind when they hear "inner landscape"
Ms. Iorga: Okay, Larry, what did you write?
Larry: Well, I didn't know what "inner landscape" meant, so I wrote "WTF" eight or nine times.
Ms. Iorga: What does WTF mean...? Oh! Thank you for using the acronym.
