TJbash.org

Bottom Quotes

• #3304 + (+3)/27 - [ Report ]

  Mrs. Lewis: When in doubt, think dirty!

  Tags: english lewis

• #3019 + (+3)/19 - [ Report ]

  // completely out of the blue
  Mr. Lampazzi: Steve, do you do kung fu?

  Tags: lampazzi

• #2950 + (+3)/49 - [ Report ]

  // Some random girl walks into the syslab, holding a stuffed otter
  Girl: OH MY GOD! THE PRINTER CAN TALK! It was TALKING to me!!

  Tags: tj

• #2799 + (+3)/13 - [ Report ]

  A: Sorry (B), you don't get second chances in life.
  C: Instead you get babies.

• #2785 + (+3)/47 - [ Report ]

  // Mr. Billington while giving a lecture on linked lists
  Billington:  So, node0 gets head.  Then we create Node p!  Now p gets head!

  Tags: billington compsci

• #2715 + (+3)/21 - [ Report ]

  // On the bus
  Danny: Corpus Cavernosa
  Sam: That sounds like a Harry Potter spell!
  Danny: ... You do know what it is, right?
  Sam: Yeah, duh! *does little gesture with index finger* CORPUS CAVERNOSA! *does finger thing again*
  Danny: Dude, that'd be like magical Viagra!

• #2218 + (+3)/29 - [ Report ]

  A: *draws a flower with sharpies, and it actually looks half-decent*
  C: Whoa, you can draw with sharpies?
  A: YES! Yay for pretty, skinny sharpies!
  C: *looks at A funny*
  A: ...Not that I'm trying to imply anorexic sharpies are prettier than normal ones...

• #2095 + (+3)/23 - [ Report ]

  // At lunch while discussing the male population of the world and how all of them are assholes/jackasses/dicks.
  Jenn:  Every guy is big dick, even Graham, he's just better at hiding it.
  Graham:  Hey, I'm not a big dick!
  Trey:  THAT'S RIGHT! YOU'RE A LITTLE ONE!!!
  Graham (in and amoungst the laughing):  Damn, it's like I chambered the round, lifted my foot, and fired right at it.

• #1916 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  // Discussing Western poetry
  Ms. O'Brien: The third thing you could write about is physiognomy: the face of a woman. Don't go south.

  Tags: obrien

• #1731 + (+3)/11 - [ Report ]

  // Driving by a sign for Cox Farms which read...
  "Your mother called... "   

• #1704 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  // Talking about having a Thinkquest meeting to encourage productivity
  Eric: We can sort of check each other's productivity. It'll be like, 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!' 'Not looking at porn!' 'WHAT ARE YOU REALLY DOING?' [dejectedly] 'Watching porn.'     

• #1463 + (+3)/11 - [ Report ]

  // Talking about how ambulance drivers sometimes leave their keys in the car.
  Ryan: I could've just stepped up and stolen the ambulance.
  Jason: Why didn't you?
  Ryan: I couldn't have another grand theft auto on my record.

• #1321 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  Kojun Kanda: Yeah, like those nipple candies. They look like nipples, but they don't TASTE like nipples.

  Tags: kojun_kanda

• #1195 + (+3)/7 - [ Report ]

  // While playing a students vs. alums game of Jeopardy in Mr. Majeske's gov class
  Laura: *struggles to get answer out*
  Kyle: Hey Laura, how about not pregaming Jeopardy, huh?
  Sarah: *dies laughing*
  Kyle: Only one person got that. It is so obvious this place is NOT college.

• #1155 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  Tom: I'm not elitist. I just *hate* hillbillies.

• #1147 + (+3)/13 - [ Report ]

  // In AP Bio, having discussion about meiosis and crossing over
  Mr. C: ... and THEN, the chromosomes get on top of each other like this *demonstrates with his hands* and they exchange alleles... it's almost like they're having sex!
  Student: ... STANDING UP WITH THEIR CLOTHES ON!   

• #954 + (+3)/7 - [ Report ]

  Brian: It could be a brand of clothes that specializes in dresses.
  Scott: Usually its a store that specializes in dresses or something.
  Brian: Well, Tommy Hilfiger specializes in PUTTING THEIR NAME ON EVERTHING!

• #717 + (+3)/11 - [ Report ]

  GirlWhoCriedOW: i really need to stop getting parts of dongs stuck in my head   

• #541 + (+3)/13 - [ Report ]

  Matt:  while I stack oysters
  I think of unstacked oysters
  for they must be stacked

• #509 + (+3)/19 - [ Report ]

  // Summing up Henry Clay Frick's involvement in the Homestead Strike of 1892.
  Mr. Struck: And that's no frickin' lie.

  Tags: struck

• #378 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  Mrs. Schmid: ...And they were talking about Pink Floyd and I'd never heard of it so I asked, "Is that an upper or a downer?"

  Tags: schmid

• #329 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  // Geosystems, after a conversation about directions
  Erin: I can change the subject and talk about my dress!
  Twiz: Only if it's interesting.
  Erin: Well, it's--
  Twiz: It's only interesting if it's, like, leather with weird straps...
  Erin: I think I'm going to have to tell Plasker about that...
  Twiz: He'd be on my side.

• #90 + (+3)/7 - [ Report ]

  // Talking about intelligent security cameras
  Strong: There's Matt L-R!  Going nuts with the AK-47!  Near room 237!

  Tags: strong

• #81 + (+3)/9 - [ Report ]

  Elias Clizbe: apathy is beating me in the head with a large stick

  Tags: elias_clizbe

• #43 + (+3)/19 - [ Report ]

  TheDanTran: /o/
  TheDanTran: \o\
  TheDanTran: |o|
  TheDanTran: >o<
  twinofmunin: ...
  twinofmunin: jesus christ what have you done to your arms

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