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#533 + (+36)/38 - [ Report ]

Mr. Kummer: That's why he doesn't call it tax cuts, he calls 'economic stimulation', and everyone likes the term 'stimulation'.

Tags: kummer
#532 + (+56)/60 - [ Report ]

// Mrs. Hennig is reviewing terms for an upcoming test on galaxies
Hennig: What is a "zone of avoidance"?
Matt Isakowitz: Freshman Hall.

Tags: hennig matt_isakowitz
#531 + (+171)/205 - [ Report ]

// Jeff Chen is behind Nadeem on the charter bus to ARML and both of them are watching Star Wars on the in-bus TV.
Jeff: Nadeem, move your head down!
Nadeem: *moves head up*
Jeff: WTF.
Nadeem: Oh oops. I'm used to inverted controls.
Thomas: *dies from laughing*

Tags: jeff_chen nadeem_kolia
#528 + (+51)/53 - [ Report ]

Danaan: Wow, Matt, what's your password?
Matt: 'penis'
Danaan: But...penis isn't 25 characters!
Matt: Mine is.
#527 + (−7)/13 - [ Report ]

// Someone has just observed that a student is arrogant (a no-duh-type observation)
Dan Wright (sarcastically): [Student's name]? Arrogant? I submit a "jigga-wha?!"

Tags: dan_wright
#526 + (+21)/21 - [ Report ]

Peter: There was one [tennis] court and seven of us. It was like China.
#525 + (+10)/12 - [ Report ]

// Talking about long, smooth, chromed guitar slides.
Jessica Ho: Robert Du is well equipped.
*everyone present in the room glances quickly at Robert Du's crotch*

Tags: jessica_ho robert_du
#524 + (+22)/22 - [ Report ]

// Adele's been staying after school a lot...
Adele: I don't remember the last time I went home on time.
Deborah: What have you been staying after for? Softball? Physics?
Anna: Aahh! Don't say the F-word!
#523 + (+11)/17 - [ Report ]

// Convo online while studying Romeo and Juliet

A: o swear not by the moon, the inconstant moon which monthly changes in her circled orbit...
A: lest that thy love prove likewise variable

*no response*

A: well...i see that thy love is A PIECE OF SHIT
B: o go whine about me to ur father
#519 + (+121)/129 - [ Report ]

// In an elevator heading down

Will Sullivan: Lisa, I like your dress. Green is a good color. You know, green is the archetypal color of envy and fertili...

// Elevator door that Will was leaning on opens, causing him to fall backward and scream like a little girl

Tags: will_sullivan
#518 + (+38)/44 - [ Report ]

C: im off like a prom dress
#517 + (−11)/13 - [ Report ]

Twizmer: Hey, I /am/ nice to my girlfriend sometimes.
Stephen: Nice as compared to what? A dying cow?
#514 + (−2)/12 - [ Report ]

Rabscuttle385: is it because penguins are sexier than windows?
Rabscuttle385: penguins are sexy beasts
#510 + (+54)/56 - [ Report ]

// In FLE
Mr. McFaden: By the way, at the bottom of the bladder is a sphincter. When it relaxes, you pee. During intercourse, it remains closed so you cannot pee. So you have to make a choice, either go the bathroom or have sex.

Tags: fle mcfaden
#509 + (+3)/19 - [ Report ]

// Summing up Henry Clay Frick's involvement in the Homestead Strike of 1892.
Mr. Struck: And that's no frickin' lie.

Tags: struck
#507 + (+45)/47 - [ Report ]

Mrs. Chhabra: If you are afraid to ask questions, then I will throw you out the window.

Tags: chhabra
#506 + (−8)/16 - [ Report ]

B: I SHALL DEVOUR YOUR FLESH!!!
K: ...
B: I've got to stop doing that.
#505 + (+57)/59 - [ Report ]

// Eric refers to a syslab computer lying on the floor named kinglear
Eric: What happened to kinglear?
Mr. Torbert: He dies in the end!

Tags: torbert
#504 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

// Playing Trivial Pursuit
H: "What power-pedaling sport made France's Bernard Hinault a national hero?"
J: "Running away."
#503 + (+55)/57 - [ Report ]

Anonymous freshman, looking at white gravel on the roof: Hey! It's snowing!
Passing sophomore: Freshman.
#500 + (+20)/20 - [ Report ]

Pietro: I don't know how you can be in chem and AP bio at the same time, I would slit my wrists with my periodic table
#499 + (+14)/16 - [ Report ]

Brian Wu: I don't feel like getting up, it takes too much energy.
Brian Stoepker: I like your idea, Brian.
// Brian W gets up and walks over to Brian S
Brian W: What idea?
Brian S: ...The idea about not getting up
#498 + (+52)/60 - [ Report ]

Mr. Bagden: Damn freshmen.

Tags: bagden
#497 + (+22)/22 - [ Report ]

// Mr. S. Rose is bringing pizzas in the hallway
Someone: Pizzas...
Dan Bastian: I don't know, we could trip him.
Mr. S. Rose: Yes you could, but your life would be in your hands, and you would lose!

Tags: s_rose
#496 + (+31)/35 - [ Report ]

// After a rally or class meeting
K: Wait, TJHC?
D: ... Homecoming?
K: Ooooooooh...
D: Yeah, took me a while too. At first I thought it was like marching band or something. Y'know, like, the Colonials and stuff.
K: Oh yes... the Thomas Jefferson Harching Colonials.
D: Or Thomas Jefferson High Cool! for Science and Technology.

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