Quote Browser
-
#4522 + ()/34 - [ Report ]
Stueben: The movie was about the English air force in World War I, and there was this pilot and his younger brother and the captain... [ten minute synopsis follows] So to pass tests, you have to get inside the teacher's head. Like the pilot, you have to become the person you hate the most. You have to become me.
Student: Wait. If the teacher is the captain in this metaphor, are the other students the Nazis? -
#4511 + ()/135 - [ Report ]
Dr. Dell: You may find that, while taking this class, you have problems sleeping.
Dr. Dell: You see, every September, I make a voodoo doll for every student in my class. Then I send them all down to this witch in Haiti, who curses them to bind the dolls to the students and sends them back to me.
Dr. Dell: Every time a student makes a stupid mistake on a test, I take this huge needle and shove it up the voodoo doll's ass.
Dr. Dell: And that's why you wake up at night. -
#4506 + ()/25 - [ Report ]
// Discussing transgender children in Psych
Albert: I think that children who are transgender should wait to live their lives as the opposite gender, because surgeries such as phalloplasty are risky and purely cosmetic.
Mrs. Brown: You've been just waiting to say "phalloplasty," haven't you?
Albert: *grins* -
#4503 + ()/19 - [ Report ]
// Ms. Orser is showing her IBET class a powerpoint about heroes
Ms. Orser: Now Catwoman here represents the sexuality in women.
Student A: *drops head on the desk*
Ms. Orser: Are you embarrassed or something? Don't worry! There're a lot more women in the next slides with a lot less clothes on! -
#4501 + ()/67 - [ Report ]
< bvargo> PHG: do you see why I diss windows though?
< PHG> bvargo: when you use it in ways that are fairly unexpected? no
< PHG> its like..oh man my car doesn't work so well when fording rivers
< PHG> what a piece of crap
< dyllad> PHG: Well, I figured there was a _reason_ it was called a Ford -
#4500 + ()/50 - [ Report ]
// On the bus going home
Student: *points behind the bus* Ohmygod, look - a transformer's behind us!
*people look*
Roman: No, I thought you meant a power transformer. Seriously.
*a few seconds later, bus passes a power transformer*
Student: *points behind the bus* Ohmygod, look - a transformer's behind us!
Roman: I'm not looking this time... -
#4483 + ()/150 - [ Report ]
// In AP Vergil, Ms. Conklin is talking about how Aeneas has run into a goddess disguised as a human
Conklin: And Vergil uses words like "dragged from the chest" and "sighed" to show that Aeneas is tired and exasperated, and there's this goddess asking him where he's coming from, and the one question that will bring him so much pain--
Student: What are the social responsibilities of educated people? -
#4461 + ()/87 - [ Report ]
// Talking about lab safety
Mr. Kauffman: This stuff will dissolve flesh. You must wear a lab coat. One year at McLean I had this gang banger as one of my students. He spilled acid on his crotch. But luckily for some reason this gang decided to wear plastic pants that day. So he was okay. -
#4456 + ()/33 - [ Report ]
// In Spanish, discussing whether or not there should be condom dispensers in all schools
A: Well, there are kids at base school that go to dances and just have sex there.
Sra Mateo: Yeah, but you guys are TJ kids. You're smarter than that.
Sra Mateo: You'd go do it somewhere else.
