Quote Browser
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#6000 + ( )/13 - [ Report ]
Mr Williams: SO why wouldn't [insert utopia here] work out?
Lily: Because if nobody worked then who would make all the potato chips and TV shows we sat around eating and watching?
Mr. Williams: So you're saying that there has to be some sort of balance for that to work out? You have to put in work to enjoy the fruits of labor? Yeah, I've had that problem before. So I read somewhere that half of America is fat, so I thought, "Oh, in America, I'll fit in perfectly." So I get to TJ, and nobody's fat, and I stand out. And then I visit the rest of NoVA, and nobody's fat. So I'm wondering, "Where are all the fat people? Isn't half of America supposed to be fat? Where are the fat people to balance out all these skinny people?"
Mr. Williams: And then I get to Oklahoma, and I'm like "OHHH! THERE THEY ARE!!" -
#5993 + ( )/31 - [ Report ]
Mr. Ero: You know what I don't understand? Half of you are taking the AMC 12. You're PAYING MONEY to take a MATH TEST. And yet here I have these math tests I wrote that I am giving you for FREE. You should be happy. You're getting a math test and you don't even have to pay for it!
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#5989 + ( )/16 - [ Report ]
//discussing teachers suing students
Mr. Zack: I probably shouldn't tell you this, but...
Mr. Zack: I REALLY shouldn't tell you this, but...
Mr. Zack: Students... are allowed to sue their teachers.
*class perks up*
Mr. Zack: Don't even think-
Mr. Zack: DO not even THINK about it.
Mr. Zack: I have a good attorney. I know all of the judges in the district. I'm friends with most of them. I will beat you. I will CRUSH YOU. And I will FLICK YOU OFF.
Mr. Zack: *looks around intimidatingly*
*later in the semester...*
Student: *is a klutz and trips over Mr. Zack's foot, falling flat on his face on the ground*
Entire class: SUE! SUE! SUE! SUE! SUE! -
#5988 + ( )/0 - [ Report ]
//Law & Society
Lily & Lauren: So, if someone enters Mr. Zack's house without his permission, he is allowed to attack them with a baseball bat or with whatever means he sees necessary.
Mr. Zack: I have a tank!
Lily & Laure: In conclusion, don't enter Mr. Zack's house without his permission. He's a lawyer. -
#5987 + ( )/2 - [ Report ]
//Law & Society class
Mr. Zack: If there's a sign that says "swim at your own risk", you arent' allowed to sue them because, hey, they warned you!
Lily: What if there's a shark in the pool, and all the sign says is "swim at your own risk"? Can you still sue them because they had a frigging shark and they should probably have had more of a warning than that?
Mr. Zack: *long stare*
Mr. Zack: What kind of pools do you go swimming in? -
#5980 + ( )/10 - [ Report ]
//In AP Gov
//Mr. Zack asks us to describe our first experience with government
One student: My parents were watching the Clinton-Lewinsky affair on TV, and I asked what was going on, but they didn't want to tell me, so the way they explained it was that instead of doing his job, the president was "playing with his toys". -
#5975 + ( )/5 - [ Report ]
// Discussing Colonial era population statistics in the
// new downstairs Commons space, next to the main hallway
Mrs. Hurowitz: "Now, there are two main ways for a population to increase.."
*Several APs and members of administration walk by*
"migration, yes, and babies! Yes, sex! Childbirth!"
*Administration members begin walking faster* -
#5959 + ( )/40 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Stueben is discussing the importance of tenure as a teacher
Mr. Stueben: The head of the math department came up to me and told me to stop giving so many quizzes because students were dropping out of my class.
Mr. Stueben: So, I stopped. Then, after two days, I started giving them again. I simply couldn't resist.
Mr. Stueben: The things you can do when you have tenure. -
#5950 + ( )/28 - [ Report ]
// A girl walks into class late with pancakes, hands Mr. Pollet a note
Mr. Pollet: *sarcastically* Oh and you even brought pancakes for me!
Girl: Actually yeah, I brought these for you.
Mr. Pollet: *looking surprised* Everyone, this is how you should come late to class. A note and pancakes. Give her a round of applause!
Class: *claps*