TJbash.org

Top Quotes

• #1490 + (+15)/19 - [ Report ]

  // During lunch, talking about food from different countries
  G: I don't know, American food is all pretty much the same. It's all either fried or chicken.
  D (sitting a table over): Hey, is that fried chicken?

• #1489 + (+15)/19 - [ Report ]

  // On a menu, shrimp is not mentioned in the description of shrimp alfredo
  Corinna (to waiter): Is there shrimp in the shrimp alfredo?
  Waiter: *dies laughing*

• #1337 + (+15)/19 - [ Report ]

  #1337 Contest Winner - Illix
  TJbash.org: The brighter they are, the harder they fall.

• #1334 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  // Discussing parabolic motion
  Bagden: And in what kind of path will the object travel?
  Myles: In an arch?
  Bagden: In physics, we have a special word for "arch".
  Myles:... Super cool arch?   

• #1227 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  Chris Atwood: Are you guys connecting mice...err...mices...uhh...whats the plural of mice? ...Oh...

  Tags: chris_atwood

• #928 + (+15)/15 - [ Report ]

  // Overheard in the hallway
  "...why are you all so close to me all of a sudden?!"
  "We're paramagnetic."   

• #871 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  Brian: Where is the Internet located?
  Michael Hill: The Internet is in everyone of us.

  Tags: michael_hill

• #744 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  // After determining that a) if eli and nathan were combined, eli's pervertedness averaged with nathan's distinct non-pervertedness would yield a normal guy, and b) shannon, nathan, and eli are going to homecoming as three...
  
  eli: so shannon, you'll have two normal guys in both of us combined
  nathan: no, actually it'd be more like one normal guy and some leftovers
  eli: yeah..
  nathan: or i could choose not to combine with you, and keep my advantage.
  shannon: yes.
  eli: fucker.
  nathan: ... exactly.   

• #729 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  Boris: Yeah, I'm thinking about skipping class, maybe I'll sit in the bathroom for an hour and a half.
  John Herrin: What class is this?
  Boris: AP Euro...... // Mr. McCarthy walks by
  
  // Long pause

• #728 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  MireiyuInCorsica: i have four bruises on my left knee in a perfect graph of -x = y².

• #706 + (+15)/31 - [ Report ]

  Mr. Latimer: Did everybody hear hurricane Rita's been upgraded to blackhole status? It's going to eat the United States, so we'll have to evacuate.
  Me: Time to bump up NASA's funding!

  Tags: latimer

• #674 + (+15)/15 - [ Report ]

  AntarcticPhoenix:  18.96.7.2
  AntarcticPhoenix: you have one of the shortest IP addresses i've seen
  AntarcticPhoenix: .
  AntarcticPhoenix: remind me not to say anything like that ever again.

  Tags: nathan_watson

• #664 + (+15)/15 - [ Report ]

  // from the TJ Class of 2003 Quote List Fall 1999
  "You don't know what it feels like with four people sleeping in your bed at once..."
  - Mrs. Otani

  Tags: otani

• #555 + (+15)/19 - [ Report ]

  Dan Wright: Jesus definitely left some things undone. Like the weeding. Have you SEEN Jerusalem?

  Tags: dan_wright

• #504 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  // Playing Trivial Pursuit
  H: "What power-pedaling sport made France's Bernard Hinault a national hero?"
  J: "Running away."    

• #449 + (+15)/21 - [ Report ]

  Dr. Dell, 1999:  "If you do stuff in Geoscience..."
  (entire class breaks into laughter)

  Tags: dell geosystems

• #429 + (+15)/15 - [ Report ]

  // Introductions at drumline rehersal
  Steve: ...And then we've got Greggy-poo over there
  *Drumline chuckles*
  Greg: Hi, I'm Greggy- I mean-   

• #386 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  // Asking Mr. Torbert to say penis really loud
  Raamin: Say it for 10 million microseconds.
  Torbert: No.
  Hyphen: That's 10 seconds...
  Raamin: I know. 10 seconds of penis would be great.

• #259 + (+15)/21 - [ Report ]

  Nathan Watson: You know you're a geek when instead of air guitar, you play air keyboard.

  Tags: nathan_watson

• #244 + (+15)/15 - [ Report ]

  // Dan Wright has just described someone as "Hitlerine"
  Sam: Where did the word "Hitlerine" come from?
  Dan: I don't know. I'm neologizing as I go.

  Tags: dan_wright

• #170 + (+15)/17 - [ Report ]

  The Washington Post Magazine says that Thomas Jefferson's teachers tell their students, "The only thing that truly matter is what kind of person you are"
  All they forgot was the ellipsis and "and that you have a 4.1 GPA"

• #5989 + (+14)/16 - [ Report ]

  //discussing teachers suing students
  Mr. Zack:  I probably shouldn't tell you this, but...
  Mr. Zack:  I REALLY shouldn't tell you this, but...
  Mr. Zack:  Students... are allowed to sue their teachers.  
  *class perks up*
  Mr. Zack:  Don't even think-
  Mr. Zack:  DO not even THINK about it.  
  Mr. Zack:  I have a good attorney.  I know all of the judges in the district.  I'm friends with most of them.  I will beat you.  I will CRUSH YOU.  And I will FLICK YOU OFF.  
  Mr. Zack:  *looks around intimidatingly*
  
  *later in the semester...*
  
  Student:  *is a klutz and trips over Mr. Zack's foot, falling flat on his face on the ground*
  Entire class:  SUE!  SUE!  SUE!  SUE!  SUE!

  Tags: law_and_society street_law zack

• #5925 + (+14)/16 - [ Report ]

  // Andy, Phil, and Bryan are presenting in Comparative Religion
  Andy: So actually, because of our schedules, we never went to the Christian Science Church.
  Mr. Lamb: So it's a virtual field trip report?
  Andy: Yes...
  Mr. Lamb: For a virtual grade!

  Tags: lamb

• #5768 + (+14)/16 - [ Report ]

  // AMT Class
  SeungIn Sohn: Is Legendre like Euler? His name appears everywhere!
  Dr. Osborne: That's like asking, "Is Legendre like Jesus?" I mean, he was a nice guy, but...

  Tags: osborne sam_sohn

• #5590 + (+14)/14 - [ Report ]

  // While discussing strip searches in Street Law
  Mr. Zack: How many of you want to have a strip search THAT many times?
  Mr. Zack: Never mind. Don't answer that. I don't want to know what
  you guys enjoy doing in your free time.

  Tags: street_law zack

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