TJbash.org

Top Quotes

• #1236 + (+9)/9 - [ Report ]

  // Resources the NRA can use to get favorable legislation passed
  Christie: They have a symbiotic relationship with companies that make guns, so they have votes and money and... technical support.   

• #1229 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  // Settling in to Mr. Sack's WH/G II class, coming from English
  
  A: Hey guys, we're supposed to bring all our books from English to class on Friday.. we're having a book.. turning in party..
  Mr. Sacks: Oh, a book burning!

  Tags: sacks

• #1191 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  // In Film Study, after hearing a loud intro noise from the movie
  Lee: You know, I hate those movies that have the THX thing in them. It's like they're saying *in loud grumbly voice* "WE'REREALLYIMPORTANNNNT".

  Tags: film_study

• #1068 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  // A discussion of Christmas carols
  Catherine: But what exactly IS a manger?
  Deborah: An inverted trapezoidal prism!   

• #946 + (+9)/13 - [ Report ]

  Ynoham86: have u done ur lotf writing yet?
  MuKowz: n'yet
  Ynoham86: whoa
  Ynoham86: that fits
  Ynoham86: nyet = not yet
  MuKowz: yeah, really. The Russians were so optimistic
  MuKowz: they used a contraction for not yet in their word for no

• #938 + (+9)/17 - [ Report ]

  Stephanie: The thing about the Holy Roman Empire is that the name's incorrect.
  You see, the Holy Roman Empire was neither holy, Roman, nor an empire.

• #891 + (+9)/19 - [ Report ]

  // After looking at someone's handwriting
  Karen: That looks like Dr. Dell's handwriting.
  Dan: ...except it's a girl's handwriting.
  Robert: I could make a phallus philosophical argument right now.
  Karen: ...
  Karen: You mean fallacious, right?

  Tags: dell

• #864 + (+9)/17 - [ Report ]

  // In French class; translated
  Beeckman - Where do you live?
  Austin - At school.
  Beeckman - Really? You live here? Where do you sleep? In a closet or something?

• #856 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  // In English, Mrs. Bicknell came to visit
  Mr. Williams: I'm amazed at how different my sophomores and my seniors are.
  Mrs. Bicknell: Really?
  Mr. Williams: Yeah, I teach a Hum 1 class and then when I get to creative writing I think, "Oh God, that junior year must really suck!"
  Class: Yeah... it does...   

• #850 + (+9)/9 - [ Report ]

  Mr. Kummer: So, the things on the floor that I threw at students - if you guys could just...
  Several students: Throw them back!   

• #788 + (+9)/13 - [ Report ]

  // During summer school comp-sci
  Mr. Latimer: I saw this movie last night... it was called like Anacondas or something. That was just one huge snake orgy!
  Amy P.: I can't believe my teacher just said orgy...

  Tags: latimer

• #740 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  // Mrs. Priem's health class
  Priem: You will have to take notes, unless you have a photogenic memory.

  Tags: priem

• #629 + (+9)/9 - [ Report ]

  Danielle: so hows you?
  Michael: I'm cold...
  Mgfrog18: So I'm holding a warm knife to my neck.
  Mgfrog18: Wow. That came out wrong. 

• #605 + (+9)/15 - [ Report ]

  x: hey did you know that studies have shown that calcium helps reduce the symptoms of PMS?
  n: you are such an idiot
  n: why are you telling me this?

• #601 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  xhuwin: it's like the onlytyhing i can do to be not bored
  xhuwin: is doing dishes
  HellHawk123: ...................
  xhuwin: cleaning, mind you

• #405 + (+9)/11 - [ Report ]

  Garrett: I don't pay attention to the Midwest because it's all two-dimensional and the people are all one-dimensional.

• #353 + (+9)/13 - [ Report ]

  // Discussing the book "Bimbos of the Death Sun", which has absolutely nothing to do with either Bimbos or Death Suns.
  Eli: Umm... Paige has it. Next time you see her, hit her up for 'Bimbos'.
  ...
  Logan: That did not sound right.
  Eli: I never said that!   

• #85 + (+9)/9 - [ Report ]

  Jack: There should be a .asm domain extension
  Josiah: Why?
  Jack: So I can register the domain org.asm.

• #5897 + (+8)/16 - [ Report ]

  // In Mr. Sacks's sophomore world history class, while looking at The Birth of Venus:
  Mr. Sacks: A student in my previous class pointed out that she has really pretty hair. Well, I'd never really payed attention to her hair before...

  Tags: history sacks

• #5869 + (+8)/18 - [ Report ]

  // Mr. Zack is talking about the last type of plea in a criminal case, "guilty, but..."
  Mr. Zack: And the last plea is...GUILTY BUTT!
  Mr. Zack: Okay, yeah, I waited all this time to make that joke.

  Tags: zack

• #5376 + (+8)/40 - [ Report ]

  // Krishnan is presenting his Numerical Analysis project on Fourier transforms.
  Krishnan: This is a sexy Swedish model.
  Krishnan: This, my friends, is hi-pass and low-pass filtering of sexiness.

  Tags: krishnan_chander

• #5009 + (+8)/12 - [ Report ]

  // In AP Government, talking about (who else?) Elizabeth Taylor
  Majeske: Last year she made 40 million dollars on her perfume line.
  Majeske: Who is it other than me who buys this stuff?

  Tags: majeske

• #4921 + (+8)/14 - [ Report ]

  // Madame LaSalle is confused about why the video is playing but there is no sound:
  Lasalle: Where's my oral?

  Tags: lasalle

• #4891 + (+8)/42 - [ Report ]

  // During FLE, Dr. Wood has received a question about the average size of the vagina
  
  Dr. Wood: Well it's like the esophagus. It expands and contracts to match the size and shape of whatever goes in.
  Student: Oh really? So could I go in?

  Tags: fle wood

• #4812 + (+8)/86 - [ Report ]

  Majeske: ...but what's life without hope?
  James: McCain.

  Tags: majeske

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