Top Quotes
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#1759 + ()/119 - [ Report ]
// It's raining during districts and everyone put their stuff in their cars...
Coach James: Kayley, where are your warm-ups?
Kayley: What, my pants? Oh, they're in Duy's car...
Coach James: What are they doing in Duy's.....? *holds up hands* Nevermind I don't want to know. -
#3449 + ()/115 - [ Report ]
// Summer Chemistry, 2008, Dr. Acio is lecturing
Acio: Some of my students last year said that I should sing songs when I hand back their tests. So I thought *starts singing* "na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye" or even better yet "and another bites the dust, and another one gone and another one gone..." *mimes handing out papers* -
#4737 + ()/108 - [ Report ]
Corinna: I KNOW that we have a quiz today, Mr. Richardson, I bet you five dollars.
Mr. Richardson: Okay, then give me the five dollars.
*Corinna hands over the five dollars*
Mr. Richardson: Well, you were right. We _were_ going to have a quiz today... but I would rather have the five dollars. -
#2143 + ()/112 - [ Report ]
// A writing exercise where the students write whatever comes to mind when they hear "inner landscape"
Ms. Iorga: Okay, Larry, what did you write?
Larry: Well, I didn't know what "inner landscape" meant, so I wrote "WTF" eight or nine times.
Ms. Iorga: What does WTF mean...? Oh! Thank you for using the acronym. -
#5557 + ()/106 - [ Report ]
// Bode's Rule Lab in Jarvis Geosystems
Question: Why is there no planet Minerva between Mars and Jupiter when Bode’s Rule seems to indicate there ought to be?
Two of the answers (and Mr. Jarvis's comments):
• Aliens have first attempted colonization on the planet Minerva, which did exist at one time. However, after finding the land unsuitable, they destroyed the planet into thousands of small rock fragments. – Very unlikely. We have yet to see aliens.
Jarvis' response: Well, there are some folks who claim to have seen them, but after talking to them, I have serious doubts about their grip on reality.
• The planet was eaten by a very hungry, very large cosmic troll. – Extremely unlikely. Although, unlike aliens, trolls do exist, we have yet to see one big enough to do such a thing.
Jarvis' response: I’ve had people in Iceland and Norway tell me about trolls. I think those perceptions are associated with very long winters.
Jarvis' comment: Nice job here. +1
Total grade: 13/12. -
#2403 + ()/114 - [ Report ]
// AP Physics
Dr. Dell: If the Hall Effect does not appear on the AP Exam, I will ... * pause *
Student: Use the noose?
Dr. Dell: No... *thinks for a minute* ...I will kiss the principal.
Dr. Dell: However, I won't French kiss him. I will probably sneak up on him and do it. I am very sneaky. -
#1694 + ()/114 - [ Report ]
// Alyson Yee tutors a little kid at a nearby elementary school and is explaining why next week is the last session
A: So next week is the last time I'll see you this year!
Kid: What are you going to do on Wednesdays if you don't come see me? *pout*
A: It's not like it'll be fun. I have to stay in school and take [AP and SOL] tests.
Kid: Hmph. I bet you're helping another student.
A: Wha?? It's not like I'm CHEATING on you!!
