Top Quotes
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#4756 + ( )/306 - [ Report ]
// Mr. McFaden is explaining homologous chromosomes
Mr. McFaden: You know how each chromosome matches the other one, just like your hands? I'll show you...
*holds out his pinkies* You've got your homologous pinkies...
*ring fingers* Ring fingers...
*middle fingers* Communicators... -
#2398 + ( )/321 - [ Report ]
// Mrs. Chhabra is explaining the spectral lines lab. Sophomores are gathered around a Bunsen burner.
Mrs. Chhabra: You're going to see three different colored lines. One is red, one is purple, and one is teal. It's not green, it's not blue; I have students who say to me 'Mrs. Chhabra this is green' or 'this is blue' and I don't know how you can look at it and say that, it's teal! Like those ducks, you know? Those ducks! The ones with, you know, the heads that are teal? It's like those. I hate those ducks! They always cross the road in front of you and they look at you like 'ha ha, you have to wait for me' and you want to run them over but you can't! And...
*continues for some time* -
#1210 + ( )/358 - [ Report ]
// In physics, a discussion about energy. Mr. Bagden swore to stay out of the discussion and let the students run it.
Michael Romais: So, what about scenario 5? The one with the person tanning.
Megan Behm: It's just like the ice-cube melting in the sun one, except it's a person. And the person's not melting.
[name withheld]: What if it's the Abominable Snowman?
Megan: The Abominable Snowman isn't actually a snowman, it's a person!
// The entire class breaks into a chaotic discussion about yetis
Betty Luo (whispering to Myles Maxfield): I think we broke Mr. Bagden.
// Mr. Bagden is sitting in the back of the classroom with his head in his hands -
#1238 + ( )/290 - [ Report ]
// In tech, while Mr. Pearce is checking photoresistors...
Mr. Pearce: Uh, looks like you have a small one there...
John Kim: Oh... does size matter?
Mr. Pearce: Sometimes. *giggles* John, you're disgusting.
John Kim: What!? Oh my god, I wasn't even thinking of that...
*students cracking up*
Mr. Pearce: Alright, well if you want a bigger one, come see me... -
#2610 + ( )/289 - [ Report ]
// Psych class during summer school
Teacher: So these scientists had an experiment with monkeys where they had to work in order to get a banana. Over time, they noticed that the female monkeys were working less and less, but still recieved bananas. Curious, the scientists filmed the monkeys at night to see what was going on when they weren't there to observe the monkeys. The male monkeys would work for the banana and then trade it to the female monkey for sex: no banana, no sex. Basically, it was monkey prostitution.
Alex: *pulls banana from lunch and turns to classmate* Hey, Cayla... -
#422 + ( )/294 - [ Report ]
// During 2nd period Tech class with new Tech teacher Mr. Pearce (from England)
Mr. Pearce: And this is how you do calculate the force.
Hannah: Your mom calculates the force.
Bart: Shut up.
Hayne: Your mom shuts up.
Bart: Just shut up and do it.
Ryan: Your mom does it. in bed. BUT NOT FOR FREE
*burst of laughter*
// 14 your mom jokes and 20 mins later
Bart: So you put the bar in there?
Julia: YOUR MOM PUTS THE BAR IN THERE... IN BED... FOR FREE!!!
Mr. Pearce: SHUT UP! ARE YOU SAYING THAT ALL AMERICAN MOTHERS ARE WHORES?
*everyone pauses... looks at each other*
Everyone in unison: YES!!!
Mr. Pearce (whispering): Bloody hell...