Top Quotes
-
#929 + ()/76 - [ Report ]
WshngtonBsball: god dammit! My hallway reeks of pot
WshngtonBsball: my friend is crashing in my room tonight instead of down the hall because he lives right next to where they're smoking it
JasonGJi: wow
JasonGJi: well i can offer you some good news
WshngtonBsball: if you even breathe the word "geico"
JasonGJi: damn. -
#5095 + ()/77 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Forbes makes a math error while discussing derivatives
Class: Oh! Oh! You didn't divide by dt!
Forbes: Ok, ok! You know, when I was teaching at a lower level high school, I used to offer students 1 bonus point for typos, 2 points for a math error, and 5 points for a conceptual error. Naturally, this had their eyes glued to the board the whole class.
Class: *jaws hit the floor in disbelief*
Forbes: Of course, I can't give this opportunity to you guys, because you'd have 4 billion points by the end of the first quarter.
// 2 minutes later
Student: You forgot to distribute delta x.
Forbes: Dammit! -
#4608 + ()/67 - [ Report ]
Mr. Green: You all know what menstrual shows are, right?
Class: *awkward silence*
Mr. Green: You know, where they sing and dance?
Student A: Ooooooooooh! MINSTREL SHOWS!
Mr. Green: Wait, what'd I say?
Student B: Menstrual.
Mr. Green: *pauses* I'm trying to see how that would work... -
#3193 + ()/75 - [ Report ]
// Story-time in compsci...
A: So we were at Starbucks and then this girl who's college-age comes in screaming that she can't sit outside because it's awkward.
Mr. Auerbach: Awkward?
A: Yeah.
Mr. Auerbach: How can it be awkward outside? Was it like raining ex-boyfriends?
Class: ... -
#3121 + ()/71 - [ Report ]
// Amanda is wearing a very short skirt
Sra. Mateo: You know, I should call your parents and tell them to not let you wear that. You do realize there is a dress code at this school?
Amanda: But it was a gift...
Sra. Mateo: Do you have any idea how many gifts I have at home that I can't wear? -
#2526 + ()/79 - [ Report ]
// Three club officers (who are juniors) are setting up an event with 10-15 freshmen
// Two of the officers leave to get supplies, leaving the rest with nothing to do
Third officer: Soooooo, um... you guys excited for APs? Oh wait...
Freshmen: Erm, no, not really...
O: Ooh, how 'bout SOLs? You guys have those, right?
A freshman: Actually, I don't have any because I'm in precalc and took bio in middle school.
*awkward silence*
// Freshmen begin discussing their robots from tech class
O: Wait, you guys do stuff in tech now?!
...
O: I didn't think I was supposed to be on this side of the generation gap until a little later... -
#1690 + ()/69 - [ Report ]
// Japanese class is being conducted outside today
Bird: *twitters loudly*
Rochkind sensei (in Japanese): Isn't that bird loud...
Bird: *continues to twitter*
Rochkind sensei (still in Japanese): If you don't shut up I'll... BANG.*acts like she shot it*
Bird: *stops twittering abruptly*
Student: I think you killed it. -
#1501 + ()/71 - [ Report ]
// Dr. Walker wishes he had more time to grade tests, work on the computer, etc.
Dr. Walker: Maybe if I had infinite time...
Jaskot: The limit as time approaches infinity!
Dr. Walker: Ha, yeah, the limit as time approaches infinity...
(class laughs a little)
Jaskot: Wow, I can't believe we just made that joke...
Dr. Walker: We didn't. You did.
