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• #1868 + (+69)/79 - [ Report ]

  // At the TJMC bowling night
  S. Mike: *Looking for a bowling ball* Where are all the balls?
  Jaskot: That's what your MOM said last n- wait, no.  That's wrong.

  Tags: john_jaskot tjmc

• #1866 + (+10)/38 - [ Report ]

  Jaskot: Is the Pope Catholic?
  Alex Simon: No, he's German!

  Tags: alex_simon john_jaskot

• #1753 + (+72)/78 - [ Report ]

  // A typical Hum class
  Richard: Mrs. Bicknell! Guess who has a date to prom? [points to Jaskot]
  Mrs. Bicknell: Oh, John, how nice! What nice guy asked you?

  Tags: bicknell john_jaskot

• #1743 + (+25)/37 - [ Report ]

  Jaskot: Lee! Guess what? I high jumped 5'8" the other day!
  Lee: Wow! Wait, how tall are you?
  Jaskot: Um... 6'1".
  Lee: That's impressive... three inches less than your height!
  Jaskot: Five.
  (pause)
  Lee: Fair enough.

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1713 + (+32)/34 - [ Report ]

  // Mr. Struck is lecturing about the end of the Vietnam War.
  Mr. Struck: Nixon began advocating troop reductions...
  Jaskot: Dude... they began using midgets!
  Lee: Yeah they'd be really tough to hit.

  Tags: john_jaskot struck

• #1685 + (+33)/45 - [ Report ]

  // Commenting on the "O" in the National Organization of Women logo (N. O.W.)
  Daze: Dude, that totally looks like a clothes iron.
  Jaskot: Mr. Struck! It looks like an iron!
  Mr. Struck: No, that is... (pauses, then bursts out laughing)

  Tags: john_jaskot struck

• #1583 + (+23)/29 - [ Report ]

  // Jaskot accidentally curses.
  Jaskot: Dammit! I gave up cursing for Lent!

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1562 + (+125)/137 - [ Report ]

  // The Norris-LaGuardia Bill is brought up in History.  The topic of Chuck Norris is breached.
  Mr. Struck: I've heard the one where every one of Chuck Norris's chest hairs has a black belt.
  *class laughs, a few more Chuck Norris jokes are exchanged*
  Mr. Struck: They should make one of those sites for Mrs. Bicknell.
  Jaskot: Or for you! We could have: Every one of the hairs on Mr. Struck's head has a... oh wait, never mind.

  Tags: history john_jaskot struck

• #1524 + (+12)/18 - [ Report ]

  Mr. Struck: Mrs. Bicknell, you're retiring this year, right?
  Mrs. Bicknell: Correct.
  Mr. Struck: So is it official? You won't be with us anymore after this year?
  Jaskot: What, is she planning to die or something?

  Tags: bicknell john_jaskot struck

• #1507 + (+19)/27 - [ Report ]

  // History, Mr. Struck is lecturing.
  Mr. Struck: And then... wait, my train of thought derailed.
  Jaskot: Or is it still boarding at the station?

  Tags: john_jaskot struck

• #1501 + (+65)/71 - [ Report ]

  // Dr. Walker wishes he had more time to grade tests, work on the computer, etc.
  Dr. Walker: Maybe if I had infinite time...
  Jaskot: The limit as time approaches infinity!
  Dr. Walker: Ha, yeah, the limit as time approaches infinity...
  (class laughs a little)
  Jaskot: Wow, I can't believe we just made that joke...
  Dr. Walker: We didn't. You did.

  Tags: john_jaskot walker

• #1462 + (+132)/152 - [ Report ]

  // Valentine's Day, people are handing out flowers.
  Jason: Do you have any for you-know-who?
  Jaskot: You mean Voldemort?!?!

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1424 + (+367)/387 - [ Report ]

  // Giving examples of personification
  Mrs. Bicknell: Personification is giving human qualities to non-human objects. Does anyone have an example?
  Jaskot: Mrs. Bicknell smiled.

  Tags: bicknell english john_jaskot

• #1393 + (+36)/40 - [ Report ]

  // Film Maker's Club
  Jaskot: Tom, make sure I put the camera back in the bag.
  Tom: Uh... It's not here.
  Jaskot: What? I'm sure I put it in there! Crap... check again...
  Tom: No, definitely not here.
  Teddy: Dude, it's in your hand.
  Jaskot: *pause* So it would seem.

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1380 + (+223)/247 - [ Report ]

  // Semester Exam review
  Dr. Walker: The semester exam is next... Tuesday. Anybody have anything they have questions about? Something you've been struggling with for the past few months? Anything?
  John Jaskot: Physics.

  Tags: john_jaskot physics walker

• #1228 + (+77)/85 - [ Report ]

  // After a long discussion in Jazz Band about why Jaskot's music seems to be so different than everyone else's music.
  Mrs. Ulrey: Perhaps it's because you're looking at the wrong music?
  Jaskot: (Stares at music for a while) Oh. There we go.

  Tags: band john_jaskot ulrey

• #1101 + (+319)/347 - [ Report ]

  // Jaskot throws a hat to someone, and it doesn't quite make it to the person.
  Romais: Dang. Too short; not hard enough.
  Jaskot: That's what your mom told me last nigh... Shit.

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1099 + (+86)/90 - [ Report ]

  // Jaskot sends an email to Stogus containing the chem lab they need to turn in
  Jaskot (in email): Stogus, email back if you don't get this so that I'll know to send it again
  Stogus (email reply): Jaskot, you're a dumbass... (sarcastically) I didn't get the email!
  Jaskot (next email): Here you go again. Hopefully you got it this time.

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1098 + (+66)/66 - [ Report ]

  // Sean isn't finishing his sandwich at Quizno's.
  Jaskot (eating 12" sub ravenously): You know, appetite is inversely proportional to penis size.
  *long pause*
  Jaskot: Wait... fuck not again.

  Tags: john_jaskot

• #1097 + (+44)/46 - [ Report ]

  // Mr. Struck spells a word incorrectly on the board, fixes it... the class is quiet
  Mr. Struck: Shut up, Jaskot! I can hear you thinking of an insult!
  Jaskot: What?
  Mr. Struck: Sorry. I shouldn't have used such a harsh word as 'Shut up.'
  Jaskot: That's TWO WORDS!!!!

  Tags: john_jaskot struck

• #1096 + (+52)/56 - [ Report ]

  // Mr. Struck spells a word on the board incorrectly.
  Mr. Struck: I'm sorry, I'm just not thinking right this week.
  Jaskot: Why just limit it to this week?
  *class is silent*
  Jaskot: Whoops.

  Tags: john_jaskot struck

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