Search Results
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#4897 + ()/82 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Blackwell is taking roll. He's having us portray the historical figure that we're researching when he calls our names.
Mr. Blackwell: Arman?
Student 1: He's not here.
Mr. Blackwell: Oooh, does anyone have some good gossip about Arman?
Student 2: He's short.
Mr. Blackwell: That is not gossip. Next...who are you?
Student 3: Thomas Hobbes.
Mr. Blackwell: Ah, Mr. Hobbes, what is your insight on life?
Student 3: It's nasty, brutish, and short.
Student 2: Like Arman. -
#4532 + ()/123 - [ Report ]
// During AP Gov, students are using computers, naturally not doing what they're supposed to
Mr. Blackwell: *walks up behind Student* And what is it that you're doing?
Student: I'm on Reader, a news feed aggregator.
Mr. Blackwell: *blank look*
Student: It saves me the trouble of going to many different sites to check for updates because it collects the news into one place.
Mr. Blackwell: *another blank look*
Student: It helps me to waste time more efficiently.
Mr. Blackwell: Oh, okay. That's fine then. -
#4011 + ()/193 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Blackwell is subbing for Mr. Struck in US History. Mr. Kummer is in the room also.
Mr. Blackwell: Actually, Mr. Kummer and I were responsible for Lincoln's assassination.
Mr. Kummer: Yeah, we time traveled back to stop it, but we caused such a riot that the guard left his post, so Lincoln was killed.
Mr. Kummer: We've done a lot of that stuff; Kennedy assassination, Archduke Ferdinand...
Mr. Blackwell: We were also responsible for the crucifixion of Jesus.
Mr. Kummer: Actually, that was Mr. Struck.
Collin: And he didn't even have to time travel. -
#3857 + ()/213 - [ Report ]
// Mr. Blackwell is subbing for Mr. Williams, calling roll.
Mr. Blackwell: You see, I have perfect attendance for my classes, because when people don't show up, we get to spread rumors about them. Is Meghan here?
Meghan: Here.
Mr. Blackwell: Margaret? Margaret?
Student: Nope.
Mr. Blackwell: She must have ditched to "have fun" with her boyfriend. What guys are missing today?
Student: Mr. Williams.
Class: O.o -
#3816 + ()/53 - [ Report ]
// Substituting for Bello's HUM
Blackwell: I recommend you guys never to answer this question if anyone asks you this: What is your favorite fruit. Once you give the answer, the person will know everything about you: your hobbies, your favorite color, your sexual preferences...
Student: So what is your favorite fruit, Mr. Blackwell.
Blackwell: Oh, I rather not say.
Class: C'mon. Please?
Blackwell: Well, if you all insist. A pineapple.
Class: ??
Blackwell: Oh yes. You can do all sorts of things with a pineapple. You can eat it, you can throw it, you can rub it on your back, you can use it as a dangerous weapon... -
#1432 + ()/26 - [ Report ]
// Discussing movies in APHUM, with Mr. Blackwell visiting.
Mr. Blackwell: See, I'm always offended at these guys like Tom Cruise. When they have an aging sequence, their hair just turns grey. It doesn't work like that. You see me? I used to be slim, handsome, and virile.
Class: ... *cracks up*
Mr. Blackwell: Well, maybe not virile.
